Three Too Many

When I was nine months pregnant with my third child, my mom took me to have a pedicure. It felt fantastic. I do remember that... But the conversation with the nail technician left me slightly annoyed. She asked me if this was my first child. I said that it was, in fact, my third child on the way. She looked shocked and made a point to tell me that it was too many children and that they all weren't going to get the proper amount of love and attention. Thanks.

It's amazing how much more poignant the negative can be and how much more quickly it comes to mind than perhaps positive things the fifty or more other people say, the people who possibly know me more personally and know my family and mention that I make a good mom or that I should keep having kids because the world needs prettier people (Yes, a very funny, lovely lady told me that! She's definitely one of my favorites!)... Along with those nice comments, though, that surly and opinionated nail woman's comment won't ever be forgotten. And today I definitely remembered it.

It was one of those days where each child was being particularly annoying and high maintenance. Well, the little one can't just wander off on her own just yet, but the other two SHOULD BY NOW be ABLE to SIT and PLAY ALONE! But no... I would set something up and dash off to clean up behind the previous wake of craziness and then another crash, scream and whines and yells would ensue and on top of Mess #1, there would be Mess  #2 and #3 and #4 occurring simultaneously. The Boy wanted help with his trains and then refused to clean up without help, The Little One just wants to crawl, but I can't leave her alone to do that and The Oldest... I don't know what is her deal, but if someone else has it, she wants it or one just like it. If she gets something, she makes a show of it until someone else wants it just as bad and then taunts. And she hovers. She hovers for information. I mentioned that I didn't want to do baths. I said, I was looking forward to just putting them into pjs and sending them off to bed and what does she do? She coerces her little brother to dump sand all over his head. Then, in the process of me using his shirt to brush him off, a round safety pin button he had pinned to his shirt came undone underneath the fabric and stuck him in the leg. Lovely.

I shouldn't feel guilty for having children. And when people say, "Oh! If you can't hack it then perhaps you shouldn't have had children." Well, that's kind of stupid because who knows BEFOREHAND if they can't deal. Who doesn't have pictures of the Von Trapp children dancing and singing in their heads and picture themselves as a sort of Maria who just prances in and has just the right things to say and soothes all the children in just the right ways at just the right time? I don't know quite if I had that in mind, but I certainly didn't envision myself as the mother hissing through gritted teeth at three little beings who seem to me to be completely out of their minds.

If you've never seen Bill Cosby: Himself then you really should take the time. Especially now, as a parent, his bit on how his wife used to be a lovely woman... and then what the children have turned her into... Watch it. You just might pee a little. And I believe he has five children. So, there is hope for me yet.